one more paper to go. oh well, i hadn't studied properly at all..
went to en' for help and zhen xiong came too. (they are my cousins.) i don't know why i get stressed up whenever they are "tutioning" me.. the thing is they never pressurize me u see. however, i clamp up and feel and awkward especially when zhen xiong is around. maybe its becos they are so good with their studies and im so slacky. don't know.
i wonder why does everyone differs? why do some people have the drive and motivation to study while some can't really be bothered? what makes one sit down and ponder over books while he/she could could be watching tv? is it the way they were brought up? u know, i never get upset when i get my results back becos i know i didn't study for that paper. i feel nothing man. heaven knows. in fact, why the surprise and stuff? everyone should know how he/she fare for the paper even before the results came back. becos only you yourself know if you studied at all.
frankly, im pretty upset with myself for not studying for my info comm paper today. it was just memo work man. as usual i watched tv till late last night and without coffee, i couldn't stay awake and went to bed. i have been telling myself that i must study but yet. am i just simply too lazy or what? ever since i start failing papers since secondary 3, i can't really be bothered about grades anymore. to me, a pass was gd enough. im not one who tries to score better then his/her friend.. i don't see the need to. i hate it when people ask people whats their grades etc.. it gets irritating when its too much. i mean whats the point? why are humans so competitive? why can't life be simple? too much whys. no answer. doesn't matter.
oh damn. im so so fat. all piled up in my tummy. have been eating and eating for the past few mths.. i know this might sound exaggerating but if i were to release my stomach out, i will look like im pregnant! really. rem how i used to say my tummy is so big that i can't see my toes? well, i think im achieving that goal soon. *rolling of eyes* UGH.. i know i've been procrastinating for a long time already. but im just too f***ing lazy to move my butt off that couch and exercise? ( u are a goner.) i can already imagine how i look like when im in y 30s, - with lots of layers of fat around my waist and a big bulging stomach. i swear im definately not looking like that. no more fast food and chips. hmm. does maria france wanna pay me to slim down? =p
Monday, October 25, 2004
what can i do?
java ICA sup paper just ended. i don't think i can pass my ICA. the whole atmosphere was so stressful. i didn't know what loop method to use etc.. was at a total loss. im going home soon.. the school is too cold for me to study. only have my black cardi with me u see.. brrrrrr..
Thursday, October 21, 2004
sense of smell..
the sense of smell is really peculiar. of all the past 4 years, i've been so used to him that somehow the thought of living without him was impossible. even then, here am i, single and available. *amused* im always reminded of him whenever i smell something familiar. especially the parfum and aftershave that he always use. i wouldn't say i still love him. its all memories. i remember watching this chinese movie, "Lavender". starring Takeshi and Kelly Chen. She missed the scent of her ex who had died in the army. being a aromatherapist, she was devastated when she couldn't coconate that particular smell. sad isn't it? it doesn't matter if u can't see or feel. all it matters is that sense of smell.
Monday, October 18, 2004
here it ends, there comes another..
WE FINALLY FINISHED OUR PROJECT AND HANDED IN AT AROUND 4.50PM TODAY! im relieved. report is almost done.. presentation is tom.. hope everything goes well. im about to leave the school and head over to starbucks to tell the manager about my resignation. (can't bear the thought of going back there. ) i need some courage man.. initially noone was free to accompany me but chong finally agreed. said he'll reach there aruond 7.45. so late.. oh well, im the one who need his "moral support"..
exams are in a week. haven't study yet. i flunked my jave ICA assesment. sup paper is next monday. i've no clue how am i gonna pass the paper. am the only gal in the whole class who failed.. the other one is a guy who couldn't care less. so forget about him.. haven't seen my pals for ages.. think everyones mugging for exams and projects.. work hard people! i can't wait for my training pay to come. need the $ to get a hair cut, buy contacts..etc. if they don't give me, im gonna sue them! after all, i've done my bar test liao. and they should give me my pay for those days that i worked after my training period too.. i did worked hard. u guys be my witness man..
P.S: Im thinking of getting a hamster from adam.. but mich and chong advised me not to as they say its hard to take care of hamsters.. that they die easily. is it true? some advice guys? what do u say ed?
Saturday, October 16, 2004
went to hougang and trim my brows.. only 5 bucks.. cheap becos i used estrella's friend, claire coupon book.. its ok loh.. not sure if i want to go back again.. c how.
bought the cake ingredients from phoon huat and met janey and adam at sembawang.. reached his place. Description: Clean, neat, everything is so in order! I was so afraid that i'll mess up his kitchen that i decide to do vacumming later. haha. (adam, u have got yourself a free maid today. for that 5 mins. haha.)
started our cake making sesson! ....... Its a success! 2nd attempt becos we forgot to add in egg mixture for the second procedure.. nevertheless, we did well! the texture of the cake is just nice. neither too dry nor wet. We are so proud of ourselves! Adam rate our cake at 7/10!.. not bad already lah.. hee.. took video clip and everything.. going to input everything into our website.. finally. the video is done. phew~
adam cooked dinner! we had stir-fried xiao bai cai, sliced ginger pork and omelette.. no rice. because we are too full from the cakes and curry puff.. yum yum. i like the vege.. juicy.. all handpicked by me and janey from NTUC.. now janey is enjoying her SKI DIVINE Wild Strawberry yoghurt. im gonna have my FRESH & FRUITY blackberry and cream yoghurt later.. we bought 3 diff kinds to try out. adam had YOPLAIT mango. simply delicious. SKI has its strawberries all mixed tog, more like a yoghurt drink.. nice.. now for mine, the first sweet yoghurt that i've even tasted. jane don't like it.. im at a loss for words too. ;) hmm.. had fun today. hope adam's mum can't find anything out of place.. or else we can't come back and bake cakes again.. *crossed my fingers*
gtg.. janey wanna go home soon.. later
Thursday, October 14, 2004
1st incident: took the bus today for maths lecture at 1.. put in a dollar bus fare and sat all the way to bishan.. thought i will pass off without getting caught. but who knows, the driver called me to the front. said i was supposed to board off but i didn't. so i had to give him another dollar. which is riduculous becos the exact fare was $1.30 i think. even then, i didn't mind paying extra but the worst thing is i had no shilings nor small change! just a 50 dollar note. sigh. knowing that there was little chance, i crossed my fingers and asked a guy who was sitting near the exit if he had small change, he shook his head but took out shillings and gave it to me.
My, am i grateful to him..
2nd incident: didn't make it to lecture on time. was late for 4 mins. (sorry jane) decided to go to BLK E to see if my wallet is at the lost and found area. e indian man who attended to me was the first NYP staff that was friendly and approcable.. :) i told him that i had lost my wallet and that my IC was inside.. he said someone wld have called me if thats the case. i was a little disappointed. however, there it was when he opened the drawer. my greyish-green psBb wallet. im so happy! i don't need to pay a $100 for a new IC now! hurray! (never thought that my wallet would be in there all these while.. )
these gestures might mean nothing to some, but it meant alot to me. Thank you.
Friday, October 08, 2004
re: taiwan & singapore
In regard to the comment posted by a anonymous person..
i guess you are right.. no point retorting back.. we are much more educated than them. im just angry thats all. its ridiculous. the other day, my dad was watching the same taiwanese variety show. and another guy commented on this issue. he said, why did taiwanese "target" singapore? he didn't dare to scold japan, US..etc. thats because he thinks that singapore is small enough to be bullied. well, in his dreams.. i agree with ya man. silence does not mean consent. hmmph. thanks for the comment anyway. later
Wednesday, October 06, 2004
Wear a yellow ribbon!
"Im really still in prison and my love, SHE holds the key, a simple yellow ribbon's what i need to set me free..."
He may have committed a crime but he is fully capable of changing for the better.
Ex-offenders too can get back on their feet and become productive members of society. Community support is important to cheer them on their road to recovery.
So be part of the Yellow Ribbon Project - show them your support to unlock the second "prison". Only you can.
Monday, October 04, 2004
re: so long
thou there were some fuss made, i've successfuly applied 3 wks leave at starb! *yippee* will return to work around nov. hmmm. guess i'll be back to square one.
had my oral presentation today! was sooooooo nervous that i was uttering nonsense out there. grammer, tenses and pronunciation were all messed up. bloody hell. nvm.. just glad that its all over. oh man! I can watch "Stairway To Heaven" today! yeah! last 2nd episode.. that male lead just gorgeous man. mum is addicted to this show too.. haha.
right. i wanna talk about the issue between taiwan n singapore now. i saw the speech made by a taiwanese guy on cable during the wkends for a variety show.
DID U KNOW THAT WE WERE CALLED "LP" (MALE TESTICLES) IN HOKKIEN? THAT WE ARE JUST "NOSE DIRT" TO THEM? HOW DARE THEY CALL US NAMES?! THATS SO BLOODY RUDE AND VULGAR! WHAT KINDDA CIVILISED COUNTRY IS THAT? MY BLOOD IS BOILING MAN.. FELT LIKE SLAPPING THAT GUY IN THE FACE WHEN I WAS WATCHING HIM SPOUTTING CRAP. HE EVEN SAY THAT THEY WERE KIND ENOUGH TO LEND US THEIR TRAINING BASE FOR OUR NSF MEN YEARS AGO. THAT WE ARE UNGRATEFUL! BLOODY HELL.
to think that we were still on close terms with them before.. just becos their issue with china was brought up by one of our pple. (i can't rem who. not sure of the whole story but my dad told me a little about it.) that they shouldn't start a war with china becos it will affect e economy and the countries in asia. they start scolding us. they even start a protest against us and burned out flag! what the fuck! and from what i know, singaporeans didnt fight back at all. and i mean verbally. one of our ministers just said:"we're disppointed". (summarised version but thats the idea) UGH. one might say that we don't wanna make things worse. but what will the taiwanese think of us? that we are cowardly and can be tramp on anyday? huh. we are brought up so conservatively and controlled by the government that one will not see any pple protesting about it. im not saying that we shld create riots. one shld have retort and take back our dignity. that said, im utterly pissed and disappointed in how we handled this case. there might be more accurate information to this story.. pls tell me more about it. comments pple.
Friday, October 01, 2004
everybodys stressing out these days.. exams coming. tests. projects..etc.
i have been pretty busy myself too.. staying in school till late almost everyday. sigh. so tiring. thinking of quitting starbucks after i get my training pay.. high level of activity and stress there man. its not me.. im not that hyper.. =l
human relationships are so complicated.. take and give i guess.. hmmph. what can i do?
P.S: I would like to reply to the anonymous person who gave a comment on my prev post.
You said, "why would 2 lovers go seperate ways in todays world? thought its more of a commitment to love?"
I say, why not? can't they break up? and circumstances and factors applies. as for that statement of love is of a more commitment thing.. i totally agree.. however, isn't that irrelevant to what i quote from the drama? *rolling my eyes*
and, pul-leeze, the quotes are taken out from a tv drama. it may not sound realistic or practical but certain meaning in it might be true in life. duh.